日记

中学时超爱写写东写写西的打发时间和发泄情绪， 但是我从来都不写日记。没那个耐心，也觉得哪有那么多天天可以发牢骚的东西写。来到瑞典后的日子是在忙着扮演妈妈，工人，老婆的角色中度过的，连以前的爱好都放弃了，更不用说写什么日记。说实在，现在我有时会后悔没有养成写日记的习惯，好多记忆里的事务都模糊了， 有时只能靠照片和孩子们所记得的事情来唤起回忆。

很多人都认为搬家和卖屋子是我们人生里的其中一件大事。那倒是的。是一个要下很大决心去做的事。所以轮到我五个月前，必须要面对卖掉爸妈留给我的屋子的抉择时，我天生不能拿定主意的性格一直左右着我，让我好烦躁，再加上身边一些左右我做决定的干扰，让我更加不能做决定。还好，我最终能定下心情，问问我心里要的是什么，所以下了决心买了机票飞回去老家，开始我三个月的收拾，收拾妈妈留下来的杂物和纪念品，和整理我一直没带过来瑞典的东西，里面有我童年和少女青春期的梦和回忆。

为了让我的女儿以后了解我这三个月的心情，如果她们有兴趣知道的话，再加上发觉自己的记忆力越来越差，我又下了另一个决心， 一定要把这三个月的过程记录下来。

我做到了！有些是当天晚上睡觉前写的，有些是过了几天才写的。但都是每一天的记录。

只是有些的记忆只适合留在我的脑海中，不能分享的秘密只能自己一个人知道。


When I was at the high school I loved to write about  this and that to kill times and express my emotion. but I never wrote a diary. I didn't have that patience because there were not much stuff to write about everyday. After moving to Sweden and started to play many different rolls as a mom, a worker, a wife in my busy daily, I have given up my hobbies, not even mention about writing a diary. To be honest, and now sometimes I regret that I didn't develop a habit of keeping a diary because a lot of memories  are getting blurry and sometimes I can only rely on photos and children to remember things.

Many people think that to moving and sell a house is one of the major events in our life. That is quite true. It takes a great determination to do make that move. Therefore when it was my turn to make that move five months ago, when I must facing the decision to sell the house my parents left for me, I got irritability. I am a person that can not make up my mind easily, plus there were people around me tried to interfered me, so I couldn't even make a decision. Fortunately, I eventually be able to set a mood, to ask what my heart want, so finally I made up my mind to buy a ticket, fly back home to start a three-month packing and clean up the  mother's stuff and my stuff. These stuff brought along with my dreams and memories of my childhood and teenage adolescence.

So, in order to let my daughters know how I did and felt in these three months, that's if they are interested to know of course, plus I noticed that my memory's ability is getting worse, I made another determination, I want and must keep a journal about these three month's process.

I did it! Some were written in then night before I went to bed, some were written a few days after but still were the stuff that have been done or happened on that date when they occurred.

It just that some of the memories would only suitable to stay in my mind, secrets that can't not be shared with others should be kept for yourself.